S.O.S

Do I need to make a new label called Thirsty Thursdays? Because Wild Wing Wednesdays ain't even poppin' like that anymore. After I get off of work, Shara and I go to this pool hall called Yellow Rose. Talkin bout some thug nasty, nasty thugs? And some hoodrats? Maaaan.The playoff game was on and everyone was all extra hype after the Lakers won. Call us snobs, but we decided to leave after some local cat was spitting some crazy rhymes. And by crazy I mean crazy dumb. And what's worse? The chorus is stuck in my head:

"What you talkin is irrelavent, keep on talkin and Ima end up at your residence. Aww naww, you done messed up. Dippin in the mustard but you can't ketchup"

   I know right? Damn. So where do we go? Of course. Wild Wing. We sit at the bar and a couple of minutes later this cute dude bumps into the chair next to me. I asked him if he was alright because he was rubbing his chest. And he was like, "Yeah. I'm not even gonna lie, that shit hurts likes a bitch." And we both laugh. Shara is bumping my leg and giving me the green light to continue talking to dude. At first glance I couldn't really guess his nationality. Either Asian or Hispanic, hard to tell because the only accent he had was a northern one.  He nods at my vodka and cranberry and tells me that I should get the bartender to mix it with some pineapple juice, otherwise I'll wake up with a killer headache. I take his advice and it does taste a little smoother. Then he starts to ask why we came so late and I told him about us going to the Yellow Rose after I got off of work. I then ask where he's from and he's thinking I mean what's his nationality. But I tell him - yeah I would like to know your nationality, but I would also like to know if you stayed up north because I hear an accent (and even though I didn't tell him, the way he talks so animatedly with his hands is almost a dead giveaway of being a northerner). Turns out he was born in Vietnam and moved to the US with his aunt when he was 5. They lived in New York for a while then moved to Greensboro NC and finally Charlotte.
    Actually, it wasn't as plain cut as I've just stated. Homeboy almost gave me a full autobiography. He disappears for a minute and I get to turn to Shara where we squeal about how cute he is. I know, I know. We're such girls sometimes! lol. So she's wondering  what's taking me so long to get the number and find out if he has any friends that he can introduce to her. He comes back after a while and try to tab out. I tab out and tell him that we (Shara and I) are gonna sit on the patio and ask if he wants to come to come with. He says he'll join us in a lil bit.
   Much to Shara's delight, he brought a friend along, introduced himself as Eddie, and sits down at the table. It was then that I realized that I didn't even know homeboy's name. Loon. LOON! What kind of crazy name is that? The only thing I kept thinking about was that sexy rapper Loon from Bad Boy. You know..."How you want that? Tell me how you want that, daddy how you wanna give it to me? A bad boy is what I need" I know you remember that! We all chat for a while. It's quite obvious that Loon is faded. He asks me what we're getting into tonight. At this time it's about 2am and I'm thinking to myself, "What am I getting into tonight? Hell, I'm trying to get into my damn bed." It was a hard day at work y'all. But instead I tell him nothing and he invites me to his place for more drinks and just to "chill". I just kinda brushed it off. Maybe 10 minutes later I hear Eddie asking Shara the same thing. She tells him that she rode with me so it's really up to me. Oh Brother. Bathroom break.

Shara: Girl. What are we gonna do?
Me:  I dunno. They seem kinda harmless. What kinda name is Loon?
Shara: A sexy name, just like him. I mean, I do kinda want to go, ain't like I got anything else to do.
Me: What was up with Eddie studying your feet like a damn science project?
Shara: I know right? I knew you were kidding when you said it, but I think he DOES have a foot fetish. Girl. That man is 34 years old. Did Looney Tunes tell you how old HE was?
Me: Right. Along with his social security number and blood type. NO. He was all like "age ain't nothin but a number." Hell, he's probably 45 girl!
Shara: So we're going?
Me: What the hell. You got notches?
Shara: It's fully charged girl.
Me: Alright then.

   We all rendezvous at the gas station. Shara and I are still in my car, Loon goes inside the store. Eddie goes inside the store. Minutes are going by and we're trying to give them the benefit of the doubt.

Me: Maybe they're getting more drinks or something?
Shara: Yeah. Or maybe they're getting condoms.

Eddie leaves the store with nothing in his hand. Loon leaves the store with a bag of pork rinds.

Me and Shara: They got condoms.

This post is seeming long as hell y'all! And there's still more to the story. I'll conclude it tomorrow.

Loves and Likes Ya