Ultimate Teamwork FAIL

We've talked about my views on marriage. Just call me the eternal bachelorette until I find a guy who can make me change my mind. What about my parent's marriage? My mom and dad married when I was 3 or 4 and was divorced by the time I turned 6. They were young and dumb though. Mom being 17 when she had me, stuck in the most suburban town in Jersey, while dad was 18 and traveling with his band. My mom's next husband looked like a broke down version of Spike Lee. He had a jacked up ass attitude- like he didn't know that he looked a hot mess- and their relationship pretty much isolated my mom from the rest of the family. My mom's husband now- well you remember Lamont? She's realizing that she jumped into marriage prematurely and now she's just biding her time until she gets herself together.

My dad is married to a tyrant of a woman with a mixture of various personality disorders (unfortunately they are all undiagnosed but I bet dollars to donuts that one of them is bi-polar) that are all held hostage in a five foot two frame. Grandma Emilie calls her psycho and unstable, and that's saying a lot from a woman who gets along with EVERYBODY. Honestly, she's always been off to me since the first time I met her and she was yelling at her daughter, Shara, for not knowing where the scissors were. Yea. That kinda set the tone for the whole relationship. She's always yelling, like she doesn't know how else to express her feelings. She's one of those people who just get so excitable and feels as if she HAS to yell just to be heard.  My dad is an extremely laid-back and friendly person. As a matter of fact, the first time I ever heard him raise his voice was when he began his relationship with that crazy woman. You know what? Let's just call her Ms. Crazy from now on, because I like the way that sounds.

Somewhere along the line of this extremely dysfunctional relationship, she became more domineering and he became more dormant. Excuse the dramatics, but the guy I once knew with the confident swagger and vibrant attitude became more aloof and as a true daddy's girl, I can tell he was unsatisfied with his life. I mean, wouldn't you be as well when you're stuck working a job where you're constantly overlooked for promotion, while your wife is at home spending your money? Shit, I'll be pissed the hell off. Ike Turner. Isn't marriage supposed to be a partnership? A balance of give and take and always having each other's backs? Hunh. This team sucks ass. Lol. The man is working overtime 5 days a week and on the weekend he's supposed to...do everything that you should've been doing while you were at home? And what are you doing while you're at home? Are you cooking his dinner? Making his lunch? Trying to make your household a peaceful haven for him once he gets off work? No. You're half-assing dinner, talking down to him and not understanding why he's so tired when all he does is "sit down and answer phones all day" SMH. That sounds like a team of ME and not WE.

Enough with the background, this is what happened. When the family first moved into this house, they couldn't afford it. Like I said, she didn't have a job (which is confusing in itself because she had two of them bitches when the relationship first started, a sister girl gets a ring on her finger and all of a sudden it's "I'm not cut out for the work force. I need to be my own boss. Blah Blah Blah" Obviously she's the only one who doesn't seem to know that we're in a recession.) so they borrowed $1100 from me and $1300 from Shara and some more money from Grandma Emilie and some money from Ms. Crazy's aunt. Come to find out, the house had a sub-prime mortgage and thanks to Trina, I learned a little real estate lesson about mortgages and payments and somewhere along the line, the mortgage wasn't getting paid. I started noticing those threatening letters in the mail pile and Shara and I talked about it but we never thought it was serious since the parents didn't say anything to us. They were going around spending money like it was going out of style and going on trips with the church, so really it wasn't anything alarming. I knew they were actively seeking help with programs and the like so imagine my surprise when Ms. Crazy knocks on my bedroom door and says,

"Do you have someone you can stay with for a while? We lost the house."

It's still kinda early and everyone knows Chelle isn't much of a morning person, so my reaction was, "Yeah, I'm sure I can find somewhere." She goes on to say that we may not have a lot of time to pack so I should start rightaway and by the way, I should pray for my dad to become a "stronger man because his family shouldn't have to go through this"

WOW.

Did this chick just say.....??? What I THINK she said?!! Yeah, I'll pray for my dad to be a stronger man so he can tell her to get off her lazy, crazy ass and get a job! An hour or two later, Shara comes up to my room and of course she's telling me everything that her crazy mama is saying and how the drama unfolded. She tells me that when Ms. Crazy came back downstairs she told Shara that I must've thought she was playing because of my nonchalant reaction. I told Shara what Ms. Crazy said about me praying for my dad and Shara's shaking her head in disbelief.

Why try to place blame when they're both at fault? Dad for not standing up and telling his family that he needed help. And that's what hurts the most with all this. Shara and I are both employed and mature enough to know that things happen. Was it his pride that got in the way of asking us for help? Or did he believe that since his wife expected everything to be handed to her- we'll be the same way? It hurts y'all, if he did think that. And what about her, Ms. Crazy? She said she would always remind him to call the people with those house saving programs but he'll always say he will but won't and she couldn't talk to the people herself since her name wasn't on the mortgage. THAT'S her excuse? REALLY?!? If you saw that you were about to lose your house, would you accept that? I wouldn't! Instead of  making my hubby drive me around Charlotte and Gastonia to look for shoes and clothes to wear to church (0_o) I would gather up all the paperwork, dial the number, and hand that phone and paperwork to my husband so he can handle that business. I wouldn't have been asking for sponsored trips to Hilton Head and Charleston (Yes those were two separate events) and if I was him- I would've told her ass to stay home instead of spending money that they didn't have! Simple.

Luckily the housing issues were worked out and we have a nice house that we're renting. It was kinda sad to say goodbye to the house though, but things happen for a reason. I'm a firm believer of that notion. This event was the ultimate teamwork FAIL. Ballhogging, travelling, incomplete plays, fouls, the whole nine.  Hopefully they can learn from this experience. Either learn how to operate more as a team, or learn that this team may not be for them.